Once upon a time in a dark alley where the shadows lie
There flew an absent minded fat blue bottle fly.
As she was careening through the dank humid city air
She caught her wings in a silver spun spider’s lair.

“Oh! Just my luck; I have become hopelessly stuck.”

“Dear oh dear what have we here,” the spider said serenely
Her voice was like a melody, her body like onyx
“I am a blue bottle fly, Oh please, I beg release me
I’d never harm a hair on your abdomen.”

“If I let you go,” said the spider, “I will starve alone.”

“No, oh no, believe me!” said the fly pleading earnestly,
“If you will but release me then I will be your friend.
I will come and dine with you, I’ll bring you other flies to chew
But above all I swear to you, you shall not be alone.”

Low and behold, Spider began to the cords unfold.

But to that poor fly’s chagrin, the mandibles plunged deep within
And as the numbness crept over her body, Spider said,
“I almost released you but for one reason I eat you
You offered up your fellow kind just to save your skin.

And who wants a cold friend who is a Benedict Arnold?
I may be lonely. Better that then your false company.”

And so ends my story, and although it is quite gory
I think we all can take a bit of wisdom by the by;
Faithful friends comfort you, but selfish hearts desert you
So bare in mind my story of The Spider and The Fly.

by Jennifer Grassman, February 5, 2010

OK. So I was craving Kosher hot dogs (I answer to a Higher Authority) but we didn't have any buns and I didn't feel like going to the grocery so I made some biscuit dough  .......



.... and .....




............ well ................




........................... this is what happened ...............






Lol.  I know, this has absolutely nothing to do with music ..... and I'm not even checking my spelling .... Sorry. Lol

Jennifer (o:

1. The Search

2. Guildencrantz

3. Red

4. Praying To The Walls

5. Blackbird – guest vocals by Mathias Blad (www.falconermusic.com)

6. The Haunting – saxophone by Todd Oxford (www.ToddOxford.com)

7. Avuncular

8. Mercy

9. A Chance to Die

10. Glass – guest vocals by JJ Worthen (www.JJWorthen.com)

11. Little Bird

12. Foundling

13. The Mad, Mad March Hare Acoustic Exposition

14. The Bedroom Door

15. The Promise – guest vocals by JJ Worthen (www.JJWorthen.com)

16. Snake

Like so many others, I have been horrified and moved to tears by the catastrophe that befell the people of Haiti on January 12. Since then, a crisis has been unfolding in that poor country that seems so big and unstoppable, that I think many of us feel too small and far away to help.

Enter my good friend Joey Guerra, Music Critic & Writer for The Houston Chronicle. Joey is a true visionary and has a huge heart. He had the brilliant idea to organize a Compilation CD and Benefit Concert to raise funds for Haiti Disaster Relief. Of course, I eagerly volunteered a pre-release song off Serpent Tales & Nightingales, and offered to design the album artwork and the website.

Here it is: www.HoustonHeartsHaiti.com

Please check it out! We don’t have a date set as yet for the Houston(Hearts)Haiti CD Release or Benefit Concert, but if you would like to help out with this project in any way please let me know. My email address is Nightingale[at]JenniferGrassman.com. We need as many helping hands and loving hearts as we can get. Together I know we can make a difference.

Love,

Jennifer

As you know I am an independent artist (i.e. no money, just a lot of gumption). This morning I was contemplating all the various “hats” I wear. I do all my own marketing, graphic design (for the website, promo materials, and merchandise), concert booking, website maintenance, write press releases, juggle maintaining my social media (Twitter, Facebook, Myspace, etc.) ... and somehow I still find time to write songs ...

However, this train of thought sent me into something of a desperate panic. “How am I going to do all this?” and, “The CD Release is fast approaching and I’m hoping to tour this Fall. Where do I start?!” were a few of the thoughts that occurred to me.

Then I remembered that I have some of the most wonderful and amazing friends and fans any musician could ever ask for, and I thought … “Who needs a Major Record Label’s Marketing Budget when you have friends?”

And seriously, who does?

So! Here is my To-Do List for January. Any help, advice, feedback or buzz you can give me would be severely appreciated!

January To-Dos:

1) Finish CD Artwork & Audio Mixing & Mastering. Send to DiscMakers.
Check!

2) Book a venue for CD Release Party in late March / early April.
… Working on that one … Click here to suggest a venue.

3) Talk to Carl Wunsche Senior Highschool (a college preparatory school) about scheduling a time when their film & animation departments can start working with me on the music videos.
In progress!

4) Begin updating blog & sending out The Grassman Gazette more regularly.
Well … you’re reading the blog aren’t you? So I'm doing something right …

5) Advertise online that you’re going to email Grassman Gazette subscribers a bootleg track of The Promise featuring JJ Worthen (male vocals) as a Valentines Day present. So, people who want the MP3 should subscribe ASAP!
Please let your friends know about this via Email, Twitter, Facebook, MySpace … verbally (for those of you who still talk to other humans face-to-face. Lol) … I need to somehow get the word out about my upcoming CD, and I can’t afford to hire a marketing company or place ads in newspapers. But I’m not doing this on my own because I have YOU! I’m relying on you 100% to help me get the buzz going! Even forwarding The Grassman Gazette to your friends when you recieve it is really helpful.

6) Get together with Carl Wunsche Sr. High School students and make story boards for music videos. Plan out what needs to get done before shoot date.
Let me know if you would like to participate in the Music Videos. Whether you want to be cast as a character, help with costumes, filming, set design, choreography, lighting … or if you would like to provide refreshments for the kids … you’re help in this project is not just appreciated – it’s an investment in these kid’s dreams. Each on of them is interning with me because they aspire to have a future career in the entertainment and media industries!

So. That is my To-Do List for January.  Please email me if you have any questions, ideas, etc..  Otherwise you are free to take initiative and Tweet, Digg, Blog, Ping, Text, etc.. I am eternally greatful!

Love

Jennifer

I woke up at about 2 AM with a strong feeling I needed to check my email ... this is what I found!!!



THE LAST FOUR MASTERED TRACKS FOR SERPENT TALES & NIGHTINGALES!!!!!!! Click the Play Button below to hear the whole story ... I'm too tired to type it!!! LOL ........ Goodnight! xoxo - Jennifer

Welcome to The Radio Diary of Jennifer Grassman. I decided to start this diary because I want to be sure to keep you up to date on all the chaos that is ensuing, and because I feel that this style of blogging is more personal (and thus may include some chit-chat.)

Here goes …

Dear Diary,

Today was a weird day. It started out weird because I woke up before my alarm at 6:30 AM and wasn’t a bit groggy. Usually I wander around the house, running into walls and tripping over cats, before I realize a complete conscious state around 9 AM.

I had Oatmeal for breakfast, most of which is still lining the inner walls of the microwave.

I did some minor correspondence and updated my website a bit before “The Big One” arrived in my inbox. Discmakers sent me proofs for all the album artwork and it looks absolutely beautiful! There were a few minor bloopers on my part, but the people at Discmakers are so nice – they tweaked it to perfection!

Meanwhile, Mike Thompson, my Music Producer, is honing the Audio Master and will be sending that to Discmakers so they can duplicate away. So … the whole shebang – Serpent Tales & Nightingales - should be done in a matter of weeks!

We’re planning on a February Release, with a massive CD Release Party to follow here in Houston. I’m working on venues and thinking about dates. One thing I would like, is for you to be able to get familiar with all the songs before the party. I personally don’t think it’s any fun going to a concert and not knowing any of the songs played … so I am going to make them available for you to enjoy ASAP!

Anyway, I will wind things down here and record another Radio Diary Entry soon! Stay tuned!

Many of you have probably wondered HOW you make a CD. After much consternation, I think I’ve figured it out. Of course the first part is to write songs, record them, get them produced, etc.. That goes without saying. But then there’s the whole Album Artwork jam! You know, the visual stuff that goes in the lyrics bootlet, the design of the front and back covers, the little binding so people can find it in their media cabinet, etc.

For this part of the job I am turning to DiscMakers. DiscMakers is a full service CD & DVD duplication & printing company. They also do graphic design for packaging, websites, merchandise and such, but since I do all my own design they are just helping me with the duplication & printing aspect of my project.

First I talked to James over at DiscMakers who very patiently witnessed me going back and forth between different packaging alternatives before settling on the Digipack with a 6 page booklet. I picked the Digipack for several astute reasons:

1. Because it’s made of cardboard it won’t crack like a regular plastic jewel case would when mailed, dropped, sat on, or otherwise abused.

2. It’s made of 100% recycled board, which made me feel green … like the Green Giant ... although sadly my legs aren't quite that muscular

3. Loreena McKennitt’s Midwinter Night's Dream CD (which I got for Christmas - Thank you Lindsay) is in a Digipack

You can see what the Digipack packaging looks like [HERE]

Now I am working with Jenn over at DiscMakers who is the queen of Product Management. She and her team are polishing up the artwork layout and prepping my art files for printing … in other words, making sure everything fits into the printing templates appropriately so that my head doesn’t get chopped off in an askew photo or half my lyrics don’t slide off the page into abysmal oblivion. They are also adding a bar code … which will come in very handy.

Next up … they will print the packaging, duplicate the CDs, snap everything together so it looks spiffy, shrink wrap it, and mail it to me! What joy shall be mine!

More coming soon …

Jennifer

PS: I am getting the Printing Proofs from DiscMakers today! I'll let you know how they look ASAP. Follow me on Twitter [@JGrassman] for the Play-by-Play.

Hello All!

It’s been so long since you all were updated so I decided to take a few minutes (‘midst the utter chaos) to get you up to speed.

• On Tuesday I finished all the artwork for the CD (Serpent Tales & Nightingales) and sent it to my printer, DiscMakers (who are thoroughly awesome).
• On Wednesday, Mike Thompson (super hero music producer) gave Jason and I the preliminary master of the audio CD … which means, only two or so more minor tweaks before it is done, Done, DONE!
• On Thursday, it was not only New Years Eve, but also my 10 (now 11) year old sister’s birthday. That’s Natalie. In fact, Natalie is the little girl leaning on my shoulder at the end of the Pretty Girls music video.
• Speaking of Music Videos, today Kaitlin (another sister, only she’s 21, and an aspiring film producer) shot the video for a film for The Bedroom Door, which is one of the most dramatic songs on Serpent Tales & Nightingales. You will LOVE it!
• This Spring (think January / February) I will be shooting at least two more music videos … so … if you’re in the North Houston area (or are willing to travel hence) and would like to help and/or be cast in the videos let me know! It’s all very exciting!

So … as you can see my life over the past month has been completely busy, chaotic, and insane. In fact, up until a day or two ago my eyelids were twitching spasmodically and I was having nightmares every night about CD artwork printing catastrophes. Anyway, that is all behind us now and I look forward to RELEASING SERPENT TALES & NIGHTINGALES ON FEBRUARY 1, 2010!!!! POP THE CHAMPAIGN!!!

I will let you know as soon as I have a firm date for the CD Release Party and the West Coast Tour! Stay tuned!

Love, love, LOVE! (and much excitement!)

Jennifer

PS: As soon as I get the audio master from Mike, I'll send you all a link where you can preview the tracks!

PPS: Be sure and sign up to recieve The Grassman Gazette emails for pertinent updates, special deals, and news! Click Here.